Whopper

As we were getting residents to the dinning room for their noon meal today,I was stopped by one resident.
She was walking with one of the other staff and had to tell me some important news.
She looked at me and said I had a whopper! I asked her to repeat her self thinking I had not heard her correctly.(see previous post about asking them to repeat them self)I never learn!!!Again she said I had a whopper!With a questioning look I said to her,what are you talking about.She looked at me and said a bowel movement, I had a whopper bowel movement!!!!Later in the day she was still talking about how she had never seen anything like it before.
Sad how when we get old a bowel movement is the high light of the day!!!!!
Once again,never expect the unexpected!!!

Dry Spell

STOP!!!!! If you get offended easy read no further, you have been warned!!!


Who would ever think working in a nursing home I would have a dry spell.Now I mean for funny things happening.There is no such thing as a dry spell at work,there is always someone who has had a little accident and needs the bathroom.LOLOL!
I am talking the fun comments,crazy remarks those kinds of things.The things that keep me laughing,keep me smiling,keep me on my toes.
I am having to dig into my memory bank for a few,but I still remember some that have left me speechless.
Hear is an other real funny one.
I have to take you back almost 6 years when I had started the first time.I was walking a very sweet women and we were talking about this and that.Out of the blue she said to me(now remember these are demented folks talking it is not things I normally bring up in conversation with others).
Her, "I guess I got my period again! I thought I was done with that but I was wrong."
Me,"Excuse me???? What did you say?"( I have since learned do not have all things repeated)
Her,"I thought I was done with my period but the girls said that they just changed my pad, so I guess I was wrong, I am still getting my period."
Now take into consideration I am a fairly new worker and still a little shy there.Also consider having a 90 year old lady talking about her period.I think the co-worker with me almost fell over laughing and I almost wet myself from laughter and embarrassment.
Kids and old people...... you never know what they are going to say!!!!!!

GoodQuotes.com - Funny and Inspirational Quotes

Some laughs to start off the weekend.There are plenty more where these came from.And just think these people live among us......
Hope you al have a great weekend.


"'Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver.'
- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman

'The team has come along slow but fast.'
- Casey Stengel, Baseball player/manager

'I think the team that wins Game 5 will win the series. Unless we lose Game 5.'
- Charles Barkley, NBA Basketball Player

'China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.'
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President

'Football players win football games.'
- Chuck Knox, football coach

'Most lies about blondes are false.'
- Cincinnati Times-Star, headline

'If you give a person a fish, they'll fish for a day. But if you train a person to fish, they'll fish for a lifetime.'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

'It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President

'It's time for the human race to enter the solar system!'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President on the concept of a manned mission to Mars

'I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

'Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.'
-"

GoodQuotes.com - Funny and Inspirational Quotes

GoodQuotes.com - Funny and Inspirational Quotes: "'Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver.'
- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman

'The team has come along slow but fast.'
- Casey Stengel, Baseball player/manager

'I think the team that wins Game 5 will win the series. Unless we lose Game 5.'
- Charles Barkley, NBA Basketball Player

'China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.'
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President

'Football players win football games.'
- Chuck Knox, football coach

'Most lies about blondes are false.'
- Cincinnati Times-Star, headline

'If you give a person a fish, they'll fish for a day. But if you train a person to fish, they'll fish for a lifetime.'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

'It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President

'It's time for the human race to enter the solar system!'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President on the concept of a manned mission to Mars

'I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.'
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

'Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.'
-"

Sunday thought.

So easy to say we will do.
Not so easy to do.
I know I need to work on loving the unlovable.
I am sure we could all name a person who has wronged us,hurt us,upset us,or just plain is unlikeable.
Let today be the day when we forgive and forget.
I was invited to my former bosses place for a birthday celebration Saturday evening and I declined.Declined because I was still feeling angry from when we worked at the Dialysis Center.I look back now and ask was I being childish? Is it time I let go and get over it.I passed up a chance to be with other friends as well,all because of my pride.
I often think it is a good thing we are not God because we do not forgive like he forgives us.I say we I mean me.It just seems better if I assume all of you are like me and find it hard to forgive.
So with the start of a new week ,I will work on forgiveness like God forgives me.
Ohhhh as I began this post I thought it was so good,now I question if I can forgive and forget.
But with the grace of God I can and will.
Tonight as I say my prayers I will ask God to help me to forgive,like he forgave me.My prayer will be that all of us can do this.
Good Luck to all of us!!!!
May I also ask for prayer for my parents.They are getting ready to move and just need to feel good about it.45 years in one house is hard to leave.Also pray that God provides a buyer soon too.
Thanks,
Mr.Brian

And only 38 years old.

As I continue to work on my complaint free world (see previous post),I am finding it interesting just how much I do (did) complain.
If you try to think of it, it is bad how often we complain about things.We complain about others,we complain about the weather, we complain about our jobs.... the list could go on and on.
The other day I stopped and gave it some serious thought.One of the residents who I help care for is a 38 year old women with M.S..Now stop and think of it.Thirty eight and in a nursing home.Thirty Eight and you are 100% dependent on others.You are unable to straighten you legs if you want to.To get a drink of anything is next to impossible if not impossible.You have to have someone feed you all the time.Your hands are so crippled that you have to wear braces in order to keep your nails from digging into your palms.
But I think the real sad thing is not being able to watch your kids grow up. Knowing they are in foster homes because you are unable to care for them, and their dad does not want to care for them. Knowing you may not see them both graduate from high school.Knowing that you may not see your 40th birthday.Sitting every day in a nursing home and being totaly dependant on others.
YES.... it would stink big time!However she is always saying I'm sorry when she needs help.I'm sorry as I turn her in bed and she says OUCH because she is in pain.
I try to count my blessing and not complain, because I am sure she would love to go to work. She would love to jump out of bed run to the fridge and get a bowl of ice cream.She would give anything to be able to hug her kids,ground them when they are naughty, do home work with them.
Yes I try to place myself in her shoes and just be thankful for what God has given me.I try to be thankful I can dress myself, go to work, go for a walk even when I do not feel like it because my knees hurt.
My reason for this post is to encourage each of us to try going one day without one complaint or negative statement.To be ever so thankful for what we have,not what we want.Appreciate that you maybe have that extra 5 or 10 lbs when you weigh yourself.Appreciate that you can go to work, appreciate that you are in your own home reading this.Appreciate that when you are ready to go to bed tonight you can get ready by yourself.
I have a long long way to go before I stop complaining about things,however I know I do not have to look far to see others who are worse off then I am.
If some of you lived closer I would love for you to meet my friend and visit her.She would LOVE the company.
If anyone wants to contact her by mail email me and I will pass along her make arrangements to get mail to her. I may need to be careful there because of the whole HIPA regulations, but I am sure I could work something out.
God Bless all of you,
Mr.Brian

Arnold H. Glasow Quotes

Arnold H. Glasow Quotes: "A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down."

Muhammad Ali Quotes

Muhammad Ali Quotes: "Friendship... is not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything."

All time favorites

I do not recall if I had shared this one before but I think it is well worth repeating.
This happened some years back and this lady has since passed away.
I want you to clear your mind and picture these stories,and I hope you find them as funny as I do to this day.
Picture a sweet old lady,very small I would guess around 100 lbs.A very soft spoken women who was never married.Enters Mr.Brian.It was love at first sight.Sadie was crazy about me.Any time I worked she would be ringing her call light.I would go into her room and ask."what do you need Sadie"?And the response was almost always one of two things.1.Where is my call light? (Ummmm I think in your hand since you just rang for me.) Or 2. I want more blankets.
One day she was extra bad at ringing and every time I walked into the room she would have to (THINK) of a reason she rang.After about 3-4 trips into her room in less then 15 minutes I was getting a little frustrated.I finally said to her,"Sadie unless your hair is on fire I do not want you ringing again".Thinking I had solved the problem I continued to do my work.I heard a call light and sure enough it was again Sadie.I went into the room and asked.:Sadie is your hair on fire??????? In a sweet and timid voice she answered YES!!!!!What could I do but laugh.
2.It was Thanksgiving morning and I was working. I went into the room nd wished Sadie a Happy Thanksgiving1 Followed by a question...what are you thankful for Sadie.to my surprise she answered Brian.Beaming and with my chest swelling from pride I called in a coworker to let her hear this as well.I again asked Sadie what are you thankful for, waiting for her to again say Brian in front of my coworker.But Nooooooo what does she say this time..... my call light.Eggo deflated I asked again waiting for her to say Brian this time.But again nooo, this time it was Jesus.(Good answer but I was still let down. Oh well that is how it goes.
3. And an all time great one.
Sadie was in the dinning room eating her noon meal.She had no sooner had the food placed in front of her then she was asking to return to her room.Trying my best to get her to eat I kept encouraging her to eat.With no luck and continued repeats of "take me to my room" I finally agreed I would.I told her as soon as your milk is gone I will take you to your room.So Sadie lifted her glass threw the milk over her shoulder and onto the floor.Put the glass down and said "take me to my room".
The charge nurse looked at her and said Sadie if you were my granddaughter I would send you to your room.To what I replied....Ummm I think that is what she wants....
Yes Sadie was one of a kind.She would rub my face smile at me and ask me to read scripture to her.She touched my heart and I think I was her last love.
It has been several years since she has passed away,but I still have fond memories of her.

Check it out.

A gal I worked with was handing out bracelets to us today.
Maybe you've seen them?
a complaint free world,every time you catch yourself (or someone with a bracelet catches you complaining you have to switch the bracelet to the other wrist.
go to the website acomplaintfreeworld.org and check things out.Maybe you can get some and pass them out to family and friends.
I was offended at first but was more aware of my complaining and am making an honest but rather difficult attempt NOT to complain.
Check it out and let me know what you think.
No complaints now!!!!!
Mr.Brian

Speaking from the heart

I know why God brought me back to the nursing home,it has been made very clear to me over the past few days.

As I cared for a second resident today who is about to be called to her HEAVENLY HOME, it was so clear to me.This is where God wants me to use my gifts he has given me.What great satisfaction I get knowing that I can care for someone in their final stage of life and make it as peaceful as I can.
Last weekend I sat on the edge of a bed singing to a resident as her son was rushing around our small town looking for his dad.Rushing to find the husband as his wife was suddenly failing and ready to be called home.I was so happy to be able to sing hymns to this lady so she knew someone was at her side.Once the family was there I just lent a listening ear,a smile and just made it known I was there if needed.

Today as I was caring for yet one more person about to be called home,I saw God at work again, this time I had to step out of the room as tears filled my eyes.As a granddaughter/nurse helped me reposition her this fragile lady opened her eyes wide.
In a loud Mr.Brian voice I told her that her Granddaughter Lisa was now here as well.
She opened her eyes wide looked around the room and smiled.As her family was standing by he side saying hi mom it is (insert names) the son said hi mom it's (name).She reached up gave him a hug and kiss and just said GOOD BYE. This was about the only response she had all day.I looked at the family and said I'll leave you alone, and let you talk to her.A while later the grand daughter came out and asked for something.I found it and returned to the room.While I was in there I said my goodbye's.I gave her a kiss on the forehead and said You are going to a wonderful place.There will be no more pain for you,no more problems and you will be so happy.I then added and you will no longer have to listen to a bossy guy like me tell you to eat.She looked at me smiled and nodded her head.
I have no idea if she will be there in the morning or if she will have been called to a new and better place.
One thing I do know are the rewards for knowing I made a difference are priceless.
I truly feel that I am making a difference in a persons life again.
It is so neat to know what a great place these people are waiting to go to.No more pain, no more fighting for breath.They will be welcomed by many who love them.What greater gift could you ask for.
May you be as blessed as I have been.
God's Blessings,
Mr.Brian

They got me good

Being a great fan of April Fool's Day,I enjoyed it very much.
For the past two weeks I was kept reminding one of the nurses I work with that we would be working together April Fools Day.or some reason she was not as excited about this as I was.Maybe it was because I have pulled countless pranks on her in the past and she was worried I would again be a success.Or maybe it was because she knows I am just a regular pest who enjoys having fun and has gotten a friend and doctor to also get her a few times.
One of my best pranks I played on her was a few years ago when I called and said I was the grandson of one of the residents at the home.I asked about taking "Grandma"
out for dinner to the local pizza place.(Because Grandma always loved pizza.
I went on and on about how excited I was to go out with grandma.Only problem was Grandma had had a stroke a few years before and was unable to talk,or eat food.Grandma had a feeding tube in.After some fun laughs on my end I let her off the hook.However a year later at Thanksgiving while I was working an other grandson called and was asking many (dumb) questions about grandma eating with him while he was in town.He went on and on until he finally asked if maybe Brian could go out with him ,then she caught on.
Sooo needless to say she was ready this year.As I mentioned before I kept warning her.On Tuesday I would just keep smiling I walked past her,and let out a little chuckle.
My plan to drive her crazy all day and not do a thing.It worked great until I walked out the door,and my car was gone.Yes they moved it!! No where in sight.I just started laughing and laughing and said they got me good!
Yes I deserved EVERYTHING I got!They got me good and everyone was having a good laugh.


The moral of the story.....Never,never trust a women.LOLOL
Have a great weekend all!!!

I was wrong and I am sorry.

Mr.Brian is eating crow over here but I guess in a good way.
I just got off the phone with my mom and she informed me that dad was drinking straight pop when I was there no booze in the glass.I was shocked!!!!As grumpy and argumentative as he was I was sure he was drinking again.
Guess the grumpiness is coming from with drawls.Mom and I discussed how a person could actually go cold turkey with drinking without some type of outside help.
So there is a praise, but please keep prayers coming for him to fight the temptations and get over the grumpiness.
Also be praying as they are both stressing over their upcoming move.They have lived in their house for about 45-46 years and are moving within the next month to a condo.The condo is great!brand new,but closing a chapter after 45 plus years in a place is going to be hard.The stress of packing,and all that is overwhelming them.And I keep telling them I will be there to help as will my sister from near by.
The other sister from California will be here soon after the move to help as well.
I guess if I were their age I would be stressed as well.
Also pray that the couple who wants to buy their house, sells their home so it can be a done deal.I think they have until Monday to change their minds.
Lots of stress for the folks, who have never handled stress well.
Hmmmmm I guess I know where I get that from then.

Thanks for all the kind words and prayers, it has made me feel loved,and cared for.I also was not fretting over it and was feeling your prayers.
God Is good!!!!
You have all touched my heart and made a difference in my life.

And I promise my next post will be a fun one.I will tell you about April Fool's Day.
Maybe Mr.Brian can get out and take some pictures too.