Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I am so angry,upset hurt. Since many fine women read this I will not use words that come to mind right now.
Please excuse me while I go beat my head against the wall.
I should have known it was to good to be true.
I stopped by my parents home tonight and dad was drinking again.I had to bite my tounge from saying anything.And he was back to his cranky irritable ways again.You know the way (well I guess you do not) the way where you tread lightly because he was in a mood to diagree.
I think my blood preasure is going down again.However my bubble is burst.
So friends back to praying please.
Thanks!
Brian

Sunday words

Laugh for the day

Never give up hope

It is with great joy and excitement I share this with you.
It has been about 3 or 4 weeks now that my dad has not been drinking.
As I have shared in the past he has a very serious drinking problem.Years of drinking has taken it toll on his body I am sure.
Several weeks ago he made a phone call in the evening when he was drunk.The next day he called that person again and had not recalled calling them.I think he was very very embarrassed by this.He was also finding that having a hang over 24 hours a day 7 days a week was no fun either.
He said to me he was just not handling it well any more.My mom has said that things are so much more pleasant at home now.Dad looks so much better and more cheerful.No big dark bags under the eyes,he talks when I stop bye.
And my mom looks like a huge weight has been lifted off her shoulders.
We will all have to take it one day at a time and keep praying that he continues to stay off the sauce.I know he can slip at any time but for now I am thrilled to have a dad back and see my mom so much less stressed.
Thanks for past prayers for this and just say a prayer that this continues.
God is great.It was all in his time not mine.
I praise him for an answered prayer.

A tough one

When I decided to return to work at the nursing home I knew there were going to be some tough day.Some just stressful,some when you wanted to just scream or some where you just did not know what to say to a resident.Today was a day when i did not know what to say not once but twice.And me being at a loss for words in very uncommon.I can usually think of some comment or remark.
Case number one.I walk into the room of a resident who some days is rather confused and some days pretty with it.Today was a with it day. I went into her room to tell her it was about time to go for dinner (lunch).I was about to turn around and walk out when she said,Brian can we talk?I sat down and said yes,(name) what do you want.She said "I get so tired of it all.Day after day we sit here, we eat,we sleep,day after day.I watched one room mate die, I saw one get better from a broken hip and go home.Now my room mate is so weak and going to die too."She went on to say I know it is just the way things are but I get so tired of it, it never ends.It is the same thing every day"
Kaboom man I felt like i was just hit with a good old sharp left hook punch.what can you say to that,what do you say.I just said,unfortunately that is the way things go here,it is a part of life.And quickly got up from the chair and said sooooo are you hungry?

Case number two.Ironically this came from case number one's room mate.Number two is on Hospice and is very frail,weak and right on the edge of death.So close but not close enough.Today she was getting a nasty cough and running a temp.It was decided to send her to E.R..Her daughters were here for a care conference with staff today.(for those of you who are wondering what a care conference is, it is a time family members meet with staff to discuss cares of family members.)After this care conference today the social worker of the nursing home and also of Hospice went to talk to this women.They had to tell her she would not be returning to her home.(this was obvious to all but the women still dreamed it would happen,I think she knew but did not want to accept it).Any way they also had to discuss that she is indeed dying and asked if she was ready to die.I went into her room to take her to the bathroom before she had to go to E.R. and she said to me.....some ladies were just in here and said I am going to die.After some talking I found out that was not what was said but it was the above mentioned I wrote about.
Now the hard part.As i wheeled her to the door to await her ride to the hospital she said to me,maybe the next time we meet we will be strong and healthy and live in the Kingdom of God.
Kaaabooooommmmm, I was not expecting that one either.I just got down next to her placed my arm on her shoulder smiled and said,and what a great day that will be.
There is no amount of training a person can have to have words for comments made to me today.I am just so thankful that I walk with OUR HEAVENLY FATHER EVERY DAY!!!!!! I know he will be with me and place the words in my mouth and flow from my lips to comfort these people.

Makes you think.

After reading a post from theghelertertwins.blogspot.com today it truly touched my heart and got me thinking.She was writing about an elderly man who was in a hurry to get to the nursing home to be with his wife.the man's wife has Alzheimer's disease, and has not known him for some time.He still wants to be with her because he said I still know her.
With my kind of work I see this often. A spouse who sits by their mates bed side daily reading to them,talking to them,maybe praying with them.
A recent admit to the nursing home where I work has touched my heart even more.Maybe because I've known the people for many many years and know what dear kind people they are.The wife has Alzheimer's disease and was being cared for by her husband in their home for some time.She recently fell and broke her hip.Sine the fall her Alzheimer's has gotten much worse and the need to put her into a nursing home was needed.When she first came she was confused but doing fairly well.She knew me, was walking,talking though quite confused she was OK.Very quickly that all changed,she became very very restless,up and down up and down up and down.She fell twice in 24 hours and was plain anxious.She was put in the hospital for some med adjustments and returned on Friday.She is now eating poorly and sleeps almost all the time.Her loving husband wants to be at her side all the time.I try to allow him as many choices as possible for her cares.I try to be an encourager.However the words fall short.what do you say to someone as you yourself do not have the words.In the back of my mind I feel she may not be on this earth much longer,however she may have a very very strong heart that keeps her here for years.I try to be an encourager to the husband,but how do you encourage when in your heart you feel her going home to her maker would be wonderful.
I often think we should come with an off switch in our body and when that time comes we can turn off that switch and be at peace.
I knew returning to this job would have it's ups and downs,but I forgot how hard it is to see someone you have known for years suffer with this horrible disease.I've forgotten how hard it is to say the right words.To not say something that will sound unkind or like I do not care.
I am very thankful for my faith and hope that God will always let the right words flow from my mouth.
I am thankful for our father who gave his son to die for my sins.To think of how he suffered so that we may be forgiven.
As I think of those nail pierced hands I shutter thinking of the pain he must have felt.All for us, you and me, that we may be forgiven.
May all of you have a blessed Easter.Praise God for he is good!!!!!!

A fun update.Today Easter Sunday shortly before I was going to finish my shift,I was in the room talking to the husband.I turned to his wife who had been very quiet most of the day and not responding much.In my very loud voice (yes I do have a big loud mouth) I said (name) your husband is here can you say hi?She wiped her face and said in a soft voice...YOU JUST SPIT ON ME!!!!!!!!Her husband and I laughed and he had a smile the size of Texas.He was so happy just to hear her respond as was I.Hey even the samll things are good.

Thanks Lee

A big thank you to Lee.He is letting me borrow one of his computer towers until he is able to get mine fixed.Seems what was to be a short 4 day problem has turned into a bigger problem.Lee ordered parts and now two times things have come damaged.Lee told me he has NEVER seen this much trouble before.Now before this next part is replaced the damaged part needs to get returned first before they will ship the replacement.

My computer man Lee is amazing.He talks computer talk and asks questions of things I have no idea what he means.He has had no computer training,no special schooling just plain smart.He makes fixing computers look like riding a bike.E A S Y !!!!!!!!!

He was telling me of how he fixed the computers at church and did some things to it I have no idea what it was.As far as I know there is just an off on switch that does it all.He was telling me about how he put one program on the computer at the library too.As he was explaining it it was as if he was speaking Greek.I just would smile and nod my head like I had an idea what he was saying.Something tells me i did not fool him though.

So again thanks Lee, I can now catch up on blogs, check emails and thrill others with my blogging.

Withdrawls

Hi ya all, I am still blogging from the library.I am thinking I may need to find a support group for people with broken computers.You have no idea how many time I want to go to my computer at home and go blog and check out other blogs.I've been breaking into a cold sweat and shaking uncontroalabley.

I've got lots and lots of fun things to post too.
Hear are just a few to add to my all in a days work list.
A few days ago I had to give one of our (as I put it) pleasently confussed residents a shower.She is still somewhat independent and dresses herself as well as going to the bathroom ect.
As she was undressing for her shower and removed her blouse I found she had a slight problem with her bra.Seems she had the cup holder in the back over her shoulder blades,and it was hooked in the front.I was almost bitting my lips to keep from laughing outloud.She had NO CLUE>>>>> it was on backwards.

Still an other good laugh came from a women who can be loads of fun but is very very hard of hearing.One of my co-workers and I went into her room to transfer her to her chair.She looked at me and told me I am like a rotten apple...... you find me everywhere.She also is the one who remembers working with me when she was younger at Charlies Bakery.Hmmmm I think not dear.

Yet one more to finish the weekend for you.Now for us at work it was very funny however not knowing her may take away some of the fun.This particular lady has some major mental illness issues.Always worries about things,dwells on the past, she was diagnosed schizophrenic.
On this particular day she was dwelling on the past when I tried to encourage her and tell her we should not dwell and worry about the past.She stopped gave me a most dagger ed death look and said....."I have a mental illness you know."I was thinking to myself ,yeah I know, but just smiled and changed the subject.
After almost two weeks of lock down because of the flu we are getting back to normal at the home.Please take normal lightly as it is never NORMAL there.
Hope all of you have a great weekend.
With any luck by next Thursday i will have my computer back.Got a call this morning a part came damaged so it will be a few more days.
Hugs to all.
Mr.Brian

Where am I??????

I am all right but my computer is not.I have to go to the library to post.Hope to be up and running by the weekend.
Or... maybe I have run off with a rich widow lady at the nursing home!!!!!
Please know I am missing all of you.I will return.....

Where is Mr. Brian??

That is the question of the day - all I know is that he did IM me and ask me to do a post for him - "hee, hee, hee" - she says with a sinister grin!!!!!! So I am doing just that - posting for him and letting you all know that he will be back - but in the meantime - I will let you know that he is safe, happy, and anxious to get back!!! SO - the guesses are all yours!!!!

~Becky