My oh my it has been ages since I posted.Like my mom always said if you don't have anything to say don't say anything at all.(OK so maybe she didn't say that,but it sounded good to start with).
I had been on a bit of a dry spell at work until the past few weeks.Maybe I am becoming more accustomed to what they all say and do and no longer find it as funny,or I figure maybe it is only funny to those I work with.
Anyway,let me share a few of the past weeks antics at the nursing home. I was answering a call light to one of the residents rooms.I enter and ask what may I do for you?She responds by telling me I need to get the kids out of her closet because they were taking all her clothes off the hangers.Forgetting I was told she was more confused and had a possible UTI, I looked and said what kids,there are no kids here.She persisted yes there are and I want them out.Finally the light bulb came on to full wattage for this dim lit man.I went to the closet,slid the door to the side,(they have closets that have sliding doors to show each side).I very firmly said,all right I want you kids out of here now!!GET OUT! (Name) doe snot want you in here any more.I pointed to the door and again said now go!!!As my chest expanded from a job well done and having saved yet an other women in distress, I felt I had again I succeeded, I had tricked an old confused person and made them happy.
Having finished my job I looked at her and said is that better,they are gone now?She looked at me and said NO!No I asked what do you mean I chased them away.She looked at me and said,well they were on the other side of the closet.LOLOLOLOL Well strike one for me,no luck on that job of truth bending.
Two days later with medication not having done it's entire job yet she was still seeing people in her room.This time I was ready.As I was getting her dressed for the day she asked if those women with the most beautiful white hair were spending the night again.I asked did they last night?Yes but they slept in the basements she told me,but they refused to sleep there again,so were they going to sleep in her room? I was ready this time,and fast thinking too if I must say so myself.I said No dear, I got them reservations at the Super 8 in town.Ding,ding Yes we have a winner Brian 1 resident 1.That one she bought.Later that day as I was helping her husband she wanted to know why that man was under her husbands bed.I assured her there was no man under his bed.But Nooooooooooooooooooo she was continuing to ask so I said we will ask your husband.I said (name) do you see anyone under your bed/ He looked at me like I was as crazy as her and said NO. So I said see there is no one there.Still not happy she said well you're both crazy and if you will not do anything I am leaving,I am moving out.I said well where are you going? She refused to tell me,but I persisted saying I need to know where to send your mail.
LOLOLOL Humor did not work either.
Happy to report she is now doing better and no longer seeing people in her room.
We were talking about resident who had passed away and some of the fun ones and I was reminded of this fun one.
I was feeding an old (over 100 yrs) lady one day and asked if she wanted a handsome,good looking young man to feed her. She looked at me smirk and said...yeah you know where there are any.Slam...Burst my bubble big time.Made my co-workers laugh for a long time.
I no longer know my name. I am called Byron,Myron,Dawn to name a few.So if ever you see me on the street just call out any name I may just answer.
Well that pretty much catches you up to date on my life.Hope yours has as many laughs as well.